We’re so bad at sex and then we wonder why women aren’t like, really aggressive about sex. We think it’s cause they don’t have as much desire as we do. That’s how stupid men are, that we think ‘they’re just weird, women are like fucked up in the head cause they don’t wanna just fuck all the time. If I was a women, I’d just fuck everybody. Why don’t they wanna fuck all the time? I do’. Of course you do, cause when you fuck, you get to fuck a woman! When she fucks, she has to fuck a guy! Wildly different experiences. For a man, 100% of the time, it’s the greatest thing that ever happened in his entire life. For a woman, about 40% of the time, when she’s being fucked by a guy, she’s thinking ‘I’ll get over this in a week. It’s not the worst thing. I’m not gonna cry this time’


“Another thing that proves how bad men are at sex is that after sex, you’re looking at two very different people. The man just wants to lay there, be cool and the woman wants to cuddle…’Why is she so NEEDY?’ She’s not needy you idiot, she’s horny, because you did nothing for her. YOU DID ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. HER PUSSY IS ON FIRE BECAUSE IT’S GONE UNFUCKED COMPLETELY. Of course you’re fine, you climbed on and went “KFHGSKG” and rolled off. And she’s on you because she’s like ‘WH-at SOMETHING ELSE HAS TO HAPPEN, THIS IS BULLSHIT!!” If you fuck a woman well, she will LEAVE YOU ALONE. ‘Thanks a lot buddy, zzzzz’

( Oh, Louis CK, advocate for the female orgasm (via silmarillions)

(Source: moscowisburning, via daydreamingwriter)

)

(Source: kanariiya, via puelladespero)

brandymallory:

WEEK #5 is a Tomb Raider for XBOX 360! (note this is a DIGITAL download copy, not a hard copy, I will be still mailing you the card it’s on. it came with my XBOX360 and I have no desire to play it. ALSO: this game is rated MATURE so if you are entering you are agreeing you are at the age to own/play this game. Also I have no clue if digital downloads have a lock based on zone and it was bought in Canada)

RULES (read these guys or you won’t win it): 

So here is the deal, every week I’ll be doing a quick mini-giveaway for every 10 followers I’ve gotten after 400, until 500. Meaning 10 mini prizes to be won!  

So each week there will be a new prize to enter for and you can enter once per prize.

But here’s the better thing, ALL entries from all mini-giveaways will be entered into the BIG giveaway I’m giving away at 500 followers! (What is it? You’ll find out when I decide what expensive thing to give away) 

So here are the rule rules

  1. You can only enter each draw once, but you can enter every draw. 
  2. To enter you must complete all three requirements: 
  3. First Requirement: Like and/or Reblog this post. 
  4. Second Requirement: Be a follower! (I do check, my last giveaway the first person drawn was no longer following me and thus was disqualified)
  5. Third Requirement: Send me an Ask or Fanmail answering this weeks giveaway question (found at the bottom of the rules) THIS IS BIG GUYS. I DO NOT ENTER YOU INTO MY SPREADSHEET UNLESS I GET THAT ASK/FANMAIL (I will respond to let you know you’re entered but if I don’t feel free to message me before the end date, i may have just not gotten to your ask yet)  
  6. All entries from all draws will be entered into the final draw, including double entries from multiple draws. (So if you enter 2 of the draws you have 2 entries in the final) 
  7. If you change your url please message me so i can change it in my spread sheet, otherwise I will not find you and you will not get your prize :( 
  8. No entering on multiple blogs. If I find out, all your entries are void. 
  9. I ship worldwide, BUT with the cheapest shipping available, so if any prize arrives broken, late, or is lost, I will not be re-sending things (it’s a give away guys not a sale) If you want better shipping you can ask, but you’ll need to pay for it… 

WEEK 5’s ASK/FAN MAIL ENTRY QUESTION: 

What’s you’re favorite video game?

CONTEST IS OPEN: April 11th-17th Winner (as well as week 6’s contest) announced after the 18th (depending when I have time). 

GOOD LUCK

REMINDER! Giveaway ends tomorrow nights!

(via brandymallory)

(Source: thegrandstaff)

falloutboyonboy:

fashionable prick

(via jeansmom)

trampled-flowers:

I DID IT I DID TH ING  WOAH
okay so im prett y sure armin was actually looking worriedly at what jean, sasha and connie were doing or something but this is what im imagining is actually happening okay

trampled-flowers:

I DID IT I DID TH ING  WOAH

okay so im prett y sure armin was actually looking worriedly at what jean, sasha and connie were doing or something but this is what im imagining is actually happening okay

Now accepting applications for internet spouse. Must love sarcasm

textsfromtitanfood:

Eren: Dad, why did you turn me into a titan?

Grisha: It’s a metaphor 

eatthebread:

Title: Screamer

Words: 1101

Rating: M

Summary: Sometimes, all you need is a little push. Mikasa’s shy bedding behavior is an enigma Jean finally solves.

Read More

I likes the posts